Care for Some Whine?

Why does our society seem to love people who whine and snivel?

I mean, when people you know are down or depressed, do you spend an inordinate amount of time trying to lift them up? Does it make your back ache?

I'm not really very good around fragile people. I suppose that makes me a bad person. However, my rationale is this: if I'm feeling down, I don't burden others with it. Why should I have to spend my "up" time weighed down by the sandbags of other people's problems?

I'm not talking about a friend who occasionally has a bad day and needs to talk it through. I'm talking about people who constantly moan about how pitiable their life is - the people who seem to be addicted to comfort from others... "Oh, but you're so attractive. Oh, but you're so talented. Oh, but you have so much. How could you possibly feel sad?" ad nauseam.....

"Oh, but you're so good at fishing for compliments."

I'm not saying I don't go through blue times. Of course I do. I've simply been taught that you deal with it; you don't expect others to. When I'm down, I spend some time on my own for a while. While I'm doing that, first I plan how to cheer myself up short-term. Maybe I'll listen to some upbeat music. Maybe I'll watch a funny movie or TV show. Maybe I'll read a funny book or a friend's funny blog. Maybe I'll go out with some friends (and I don't talk about being sad!). Next, I plan how to deal with whatever is pressuring me. Then, I come out of my shell and I solve my problem.

I suppose my attitude may stem from my years teaching primary school. It's always better to deal with little "owies" with some ice or a band-aid, wipe the tears, then walk away. Linger too long and the children won't learn to deal with problems themselves.

Then again, maybe my approach comes from even further back - my up-bringing. My parents instilled a strong sense of self-responsibility into each of their children. We were all taught that , although we can't always control what comes our way, we have to take control over how we deal with it. We have to be in charge. As a result, none of us has trouble dealing with what life throws at us - and believe me - it has thrown a few curveballs our way.

Of course, there are people who need real help. These people aren't going to feel better because of friends patting them on the back or holding their hands. They need to see someone who has training in this particular field. But yet again - take control - get that help.

It's probably a good thing I'm raising boys and not girls. "Shake it off!" "Put some butta on it!" Those are sayings you'll hear around our house fairly often. Come to think of it, I can think of quite a few girls who would benefit from this philosophy, as well.

I'm not really a witch, although I know I sound like one. I guess I've just come to my limit with a few situations in my life. Don't get me wrong, though. I'm not whining; I'm ranting. There's a huge difference. (Haha)